I was just sitting there drinking my tea, as good Ninja do. Then this ass tard waltzes in and says I was in his seat. Me not being in my Dogi, he had no idea of my power. So, I said, "Excuse me for pointing out sir, but I do believe that these seats are name free." He just gave me a nasty stare. He started to go for his sword and I said, "I would not do that if I was you." He was like, "What!? You little bastard! How dare you!" Then I said, "I just don't feel like having to drink bloody tea." At that point everyone was sitting back and watching in awe. Then, he went for his sword in one swift move. I pulled my Tanto out from under my shirt and spun to my right, cutting upward and slicing his sword weilding hand off. As I continued to spin, with my left hand I threw a Shuriken straight into his nuts. It sounded like, "Ka-Sploik!" He fell to the ground and cried like the sissy Samurai he was. I walked over to his hand and picked up his sword. I went to his body and pulled off his Scabbard, then I resheathed his sword. I bowed to him and said, "Please accept my apologies, but I do believe you went for your weapon first." At this point, everyone in the tavern was shocked, they couldn't believe that little old me did all that. So, I wanted to leave them with one final shock. After I came up from my bow, I took his sword, Scabbard and all, and shoved it straight up his arse! I had never seen people's eyes get so big until that moment. After that, I put on my straw hat, nodded to the villagers in the tavern and walked home.

God I love being a Ninja!!